Title : Weekend Tennis Roundup
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Weekend Tennis Roundup
Some seriously ambivalent feelings about this weekend's Davis Cup results, which I'm pretty sure are the last year they will be held in the traditional format. First off, couldn't help but be a bit pained by Frances Tiafoe's loss to Borna Coric in the tie-deciding match.
(There was A LOT of ass on that court, boys!) I love Borna and it's nice to see him follow up on his best-ever Grand Slam result. But after Ryan Harrison and 40-year-old Mike Bryan -- who came out of Davis Cup retirement for the occasion -- won a five-hour epic over Ivan Dodig and Mate Pavic 7-5, 7-6(8), 1-6, 6-7(7), 7-6 (5) that hearkened back to the days of Davis Cup I grew up with, it was hard not to let my American roots show.
Half the Harrison brothers and half the Ryan brothers
Still, congrats to little Croatia. I hope to be in a sea of hot Croatian men soon!
The other tie was a little more straightforward. I watched Lucas Pouille rally to defeat Roberto Bautista-Agut in five sets ...
and there wasn't an angle at which the Frenchman's ass -- showcased in blue briefs under tight white shorts -- didn't mesmerize us.
The only time I regretted my rooting for France was when coach Yannick Noah posed for this photo. How do you say "I don't need to see THAT" in French?
Kind of funny that we'll have a rematch of the World Cup final, only this time I'll actually tune in!
From the cranky Italian's Instagram account: I'd sure like to know more about Fabio Fognini's "solid Sunday session" with "the young one," Matteo Berrettini ...
On the women's side, there weren't a lot of brand-name players in competition. So Pauline Parmentier of France was able to snatch her second title of the year, beating American qualifier Jessica Pegula, 7-5, 6-2 in the final of Quebec City.
And Hsieh Su-Wei -- whose game tickles me to no end -- continued her comeback, defeating 17-year-old "American" Amanda Anisimova to win the crown in Hiroshima. The Russian-born runner-up has a lot of buzz, with Chris Evert calling her "the real deal" on Twitter after she won her semifinal.
The Taiwanese will return the Top 30 with this win while Anisimova will crack the Top 100 for the first time.
In exciting news, Naomi Osaka inked an $8.5 million deal with Adidas, making her the highest-paid athlete ever to endorse the German mega brand.
And regarding last weekend's U.S. Open officiating fiasco, Serena Williams's "double standard" excuse was put to the test when Christopher Clarey of the New York Times did a little research and found that no, women aren't penalized more often than men. In fact, not by a long shot.
So much for that theory ...
And last but not least: Was missing my brother Bill a little extra over the weekend because he’s the only other person who would appreciate that this kid on “Forever” (Maya Rudolph’s new Amazon show) is practically wearing Martina’s (Kim cigarettes!) shirt from the 1981 U.S. Open ...
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